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DBT Diary Card

Instructions: Please complete this DBT Diary Card daily. It is designed to help you track your emotions, urges, behaviors, and use of DBT skills. This will assist in identifying patterns and areas for improvement in your therapy.

Daily Mood and Emotions Tracking - Anxiety

How does your anxiety levels feel today?

Daily Mood and Emotions Tracking - Sadness

How does your sadness levels feel today?

Daily Mood and Emotions Tracking - Anger

How does your anger levels feel today?

Daily Mood and Emotions Tracking - Shame/Guilt

How does your Shame/Guilt levels feel today?

Daily Mood and Emotions Tracking - Happiness

How does your Happiness levels feel today?

Urges Tracking - Self Harm
Urges Tracking - Substance Use
Urges Tracking - Disordered Eating
Behavior Tracking - Self Harm
Behavior Tracking - Substance Use
Behavior Tracking - Disordered Eating
Behavior Tracking - Other
Coping Skills Usage Coping Skills Usage
Effectiveness of DBT Skills - Mindfulness
Effectiveness of DBT Skills - Distress Tolerance
Effectiveness of DBT Skills - Emotion Regulation
Effectiveness of DBT Skills - Interpersonal Effectiveness
DBT-Based Mindfulness Technique: Wise Mind

What Is Wise Mind?

Wise Mind is the middle ground between two extremes: Emotion Mind, driven purely by feelings, and Reasonable Mind, led solely by logic. DBT teaches that tapping into Wise Mind integrates both emotional awareness and rational thought. This balanced state helps you respond to stressors in ways aligned with your deeper values and long-term goals. Cultivating Wise Mind is a core mindfulness skill in DBT that you can practice anywhere, anytime.

Steps to Practice Wise Mind

  1. Pause and Breathe

    • Gently stop what you’re doing and take three slow, deep breaths.

    • Focus your attention on the rise and fall of your chest.

  2. Observe Thoughts and Feelings

    • Notice the thoughts racing through your mind without judging them.

    • Label any strong emotions (anger, sadness, anxiety) as they arise.

  3. Identify Emotion Mind vs. Reasonable Mind

    • Ask yourself: “Am I leaning more toward pure emotion or pure logic right now?”

    • Recognize when one side is overwhelming the other.

  4. Access Wise Mind

    • Invite a compassionate, calm inner voice that sees both sides.

    • Ask, “What would my Wise Mind say or do in this moment?”

  5. Respond from Wise Mind

    • Choose an action or thought that honors both your feelings and practical needs.

    • Commit to that balanced response.

Tips for Deepening Your Wise Mind Practice

  • Schedule Short Check-Ins Aim for two one-minute breaks each day to run through the Wise Mind steps.

  • Use “Choice Phrases” Practice phrases like “I can feel my anger, and it’s okay to slow down.”

  • Anchor with a Visual Cue Pick a small object (a stone, a ring) to touch whenever you need a Wise Mind reminder.

  • Journal Your Insights After each practice, jot down what Wise Mind revealed versus your initial impulse.

Applying Wise Mind in Daily Life

  • In Conflict Pause mid-argument, notice your body tension, then reframe responses through Wise Mind.

  • Under Work Pressure Before answering emails or calls, take a breath break to integrate facts and feelings.

  • During Self-Criticism When self-judgment pops up, check whether you’re in Emotion or Reasonable Mind, then shift to Wise Mind for kinder self-talk.

DBT Distress Tolerance Technique: The STOP Skill

What Is the STOP Skill?

The STOP skill is a simple yet powerful way to interrupt overwhelming emotions and impulsive reactions.

It helps you create a pause between a distressing event and your response, giving you space to choose a more effective action.

This fits within DBT’s Crisis Survival Strategies, designed to keep you safe when intense feelings strike.

Steps to Practice STOP

  1. Stop

    • Literally halt whatever you’re doing.

  2. Take a Step Back

    • Physically or mentally distance yourself from the situation.

  3. Observe

    • Notice what’s happening inside (thoughts, feelings, urges) and outside (environment, other people).

  4. Proceed Mindfully

    • Choose an action that aligns with your Wise Mind—one that balances emotion and reason.

Tips for Deepening Your STOP Practice

  • Anchor with Your Breath Before you “Stop,” take one slow, deep inhale and exhale.

  • Create a Mental Cue Use a keyword or image (e.g., a red stop sign) to instantly trigger the technique.

  • Keep a Reminder Handy Jot “S-T-O-P” on a sticky note in places where distress often pops up.

Applying STOP in Daily Life

  • In Arguments When voices rise, pause and physically take a small step back to break the escalation.

  • Facing Cravings or Urges Hit “Pause,” note the urge without judgment, then decide whether to act or let it pass.

  • Under Work Stress Mid-meeting or before replying to an email, pause to center yourself and respond thoughtfully.

DBT Emotion Regulation Technique: Opposite Action

Opposite Action means deliberately doing the opposite of what your intense emotion urges you to do when that emotion doesn’t fit the facts.

It rewires your brain’s habit of reacting automatically, helping you break free from unhelpful patterns and feel more in control.

Steps to Practice Opposite Action

  1. Identify the Emotion

    • Notice exactly what you’re feeling (e.g., anger, shame, fear).

  2. Check the Urge

    • Ask yourself: “What do I want to do right now because of this emotion?”

  3. Assess Fit with Reality

    • Determine if the action urge matches the actual situation and your long-term goals.

  4. Choose the Opposite Action

    • If your urge is unhelpful, plan and carry out an action that conflicts with it.

  5. Repeat as Needed

    • Keep practicing until new responses become more automatic than the old ones.

Tips for Deepening Your Practice

  • Start Small Pick low-stakes situations (e.g., say hello when you feel shy) to build confidence first.

  • Anchor with Affirmations Remind yourself: “I can choose a different path than my first impulse.”

  • Track Progress Journal each time you use Opposite Action: note the emotion, your urge, and the outcome.

Applying Opposite Action in Daily Life

  • When Angry Urge: Yell or slam a door Opposite: Speak calmly or leave the room to cool off

  • When Depressed Urge: Isolate or stay in bed Opposite: Go for a walk or call a supportive friend

  • When Anxious Urge: Avoid the situation Opposite: Approach it in small, manageable steps

DBT Interpersonal Effectiveness Technique: DEAR MAN

 

DEAR MAN is a structured strategy for asking for what you need or saying no to requests while maintaining a healthy relationship.

It guides you through describing the situation, expressing your feelings, and asserting your needs in a clear, respectful way.

By following each step, you stand a better chance of getting your goals met and keeping the interaction positive.

Steps to Practice DEAR MAN

  1. Describe

    • State the facts of the situation without judgment or exaggeration.

  2. Express

    • Share your feelings and opinions about what you’ve described.

  3. Assert

    • Clearly state what you want or need from the other person.

  4. Reinforce

    • Explain the positive outcome if they agree to your request.

  5. Mindful

    • Stay focused on your goal and ignore distractions or criticism.

  6. Appear Confident

    • Use steady eye contact, an even tone, and relaxed body language.

  7. Negotiate

    • Offer to compromise or ask what the other person needs in return.

Tips for Deepening Your DEAR MAN Practice

  • Role-Play Ahead of Time Practice each step with a friend or in front of a mirror.

  • Use Short, Simple Statements Keep each piece of DEAR MAN concise to avoid confusion.

  • Track Your Successes Note when you get what you asked for and how the interaction went.

Applying DEAR MAN in Daily Life

  • Requesting Time Off Describe your workload, express why it matters, and assert the days you need.

  • Setting Boundaries with Family Express how certain topics affect you and request a change in conversation style.

  • Negotiating at Work Reinforce how your proposal benefits the team and offer a win-win compromise.

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